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Thursday, April 28, 2011

Hopelessly Devoted to...

I have never liked the word ‘devotions.’ All my life I have heard that word spoken to me, preached at me, or commanded to me, “Do your devotions every day.” “Did you have your devotions today?” “What was your devotion on today?” I know that one of the definitions of the word devotions is “prayers or religious texts” which we interpret as spending time reading the said texts, but I don’t particularly like that definition. I don’t like it because I think we have taken a powerful life transforming word and reduced its meaning into something we can control. Something we can manipulate. Something we can check off of our ‘to do’ list to make us feel as if we have accomplished something magnificent.

As I spend time reading my Bible, or 'devotional book' I can easily rationalize to myself that this 15-20 minute exercise somehow proves my devotion, (hence the word ‘devotions).’ But the true definition of the word (well, maybe not the true definition, but the first definition listed for this word) is not a prayer or religious book but an “ardent, often selfless affection and dedication as to a person or a principle.” Or, “strong attachment to or affection for a cause or a person marked by dedicated loyalty.”

When I was in junior high, I was ‘in love’ with a boy at my church. Honestly speaking, I was probably in love with several boys throughout my junior high school career, but this particular one as I recall, was truly ‘the one.’ Every time I saw him, my heart would pound in my chest and my mind would get all mushy. I still remember sitting in my all girl Sunday school class looking out the window and seeing him downstairs. He was so handsome and at least two years older than me! Watching the clock on the wall with the hands that moved oh so slowly would drive me practically insane as I waited impatiently for our lesson to be over. And then, at that magical moment when our teacher would dismiss us, I would plunge down the stairs as fast as I could and race around the corner until I was just before his line of sight. Then, I would round the corner and slowly, casually, 'happen' to walk by right where he was.

During the school week, I would often daydream about him and all of the fun we could have together if only he would notice me (which for the record, he never did). I was obsessed with thoughts about this boy and my mind was continuously planning ways to ‘accidentally’ run into him at church, relentlessly plotting methods to make sure I was on his team for youth group games – I was hopelessly devoted to him.

And so I find myself on this “D” day, asking, am I hopelessly devoted to God? Am I consumed by Him? Do I pine after Him with my every waking thought? Or, am I checking Him off my ‘to do’ list each day at the close of my ‘devotions?' Somehow it seems to me that the God of the universe should get more of my time, my heart, my devotion, than a seventh grade crush - or a 15 minute devotional. God has given everything to bring me into a relationship with Him. He adores me, loves me, and pursues me - how can I not do the same?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thank you for exploring this thought. He absolutely should be the center of our devotion, especially in the tender, love and affection way. Sometimes, I am smitten and other times I allow myself to get too busy and He becomes just a number on my to do list. I want to get back to hopelessly devoted.....Thank you for a great "D"!

Jackie said...

How easy it is for me to allow my bible study time to go on the same list as running the vacuum or folding the laundry. Thank you for this insightful reminder that he wants my heart, not just my notebook.

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